Happiness

Being "poor" is a term we slap on to Third World countries. We label the developing world as just that-"developing"-as though it lacks progress and is not stable enough to survive on its own. When I was in Tanzania, everyone repeated "oh, that's such a poor country, isn't it?" giving this country its seal of fate, signifying that everything I would encounter would be summed up in images of starving children and unsanitary living quarters. While there are various ways in which Nepal may seem “poor”, I just can’t shake the moments that I witness every day from my mind that inherently defy this label. Yes, there is trash on the ground, streetlights cannot be found, dust blows in the air from the polluted street, and in some places there is a child begging at your feet. But the thing is, people are happy. Not everyone, of course. But everywhere I go, I catch glimpses of life in Kathmandu and it fills me with happiness to see how happy others can be.

Market Kid (Thamel, Nepal) 

In the U.S. you may walk along the street and see people heading to work, busily clicking away at their cell phones with sunglasses covering their eyes. Many jump in their air-conditioned cars, listening to the radio as they prepare to punch in for their 9 to 5.

In Nepal, people head to work just the same. Only their eyes are ahead, looking for oncoming traffic while carrying their briefcases under their arms as they navigate the streets. Others hop on a bus, squeezing into tight quarters and handing over 15 rupees as they sputter along to the office.

Biking with Dad (Kathmandu, Nepal)

The Commute (Patan, Nepal) 

In the U.S. kids don’t play in the city streets. They hold their parents’ hands and walk, staring at the ground, picking up bugs or pebbles that strike their fancy.

In Nepal, kids are everywhere. Some play marbles outside a shop. Others help take care of their little siblings, snacking on a bag of raw ChauChau noodles as they walk to school holding hands. Some ride bikes along the sidewalk. And many young boys ride the bus, collecting passengers’ money to earn a living.

On the Street (Jawalakhel, Nepal)

In the U.S. you’ll see a squirrel climb a tree and pigeons swarm around some leftover crumbs from a woman’s sandwich. Maybe someone will run past, dog in tow. Or a small trail of ants will follow the cracks along the sidewalk, busily crawling toward a water source.

In Nepal, there’s no shortage of animals in the streets. It’s normal for a bull or calf to walk along the sidewalk or even cross the street stopping traffic as cars honk for it to move along. Pigeons flock around grains of rice that were given as offerings at temples. Dogs are everywhere- all of them mutts- searching for leftover food or a place to close their eyes and rest.

Calf on the Street (Naxal, Nepal)

My point is, that while these differences distinguish Nepal from the U.S., it does not make one "poor" and the other "developed". It simply means they are different places with different people who, surprisingly, have very similar ideas about life. I would like to argue though, that these two places have very different ideas about happiness. In the U.S. we tend to measure happiness based on wealth, on things, on what we can show we have earned for ourselves. We are so obsessed with happiness that we force it upon ourselves, relying on media or entertainment to fulfill our need for a laugh or smile. While this makes us hard working and future oriented, sometimes we forget to take a moment and appreciate the little things. We are so busy worrying, trying to be what we want to be that we forget to just be.

In Nepal, some might argue there is the opposite problem: people are too focused on the present so that short-term fixes are not sufficient enough and cannot be sustained. While this argument may be valid, there are also so many ways that this approach works to keep people happy. Sometimes you have to make the most of what you’ve got, and at times that can be short-lived. But I’ve found that most people here really know how to love their families, to care for one another, and to smile and laugh whenever they can.

Best Friends (Larjung, Nepal)

So when I return to the U.S. I’ll miss walking past the grandpas on the street laughing over chiyaa while their wives sit across the courtyard gossiping about their children. I’ll miss seeing a store shop didi help a customer as her chorri sits patiently next to her, entertaining herself with makeshift toys. I’ll miss the big sisters helping her little siblings with homework as their parents continue to skillfully sew kurtas, saris, and cholos for waiting customers. I’ll miss the two friends on a motorcycle, trying to balance all their things while navigating busy traffic and carrying on a conversation through their helmets and masks. I’ll miss walking past a young mother with a baby on her back as she carries groceries home, the nani smiling happily as she bounces up and down, staring at the world around her. And lastly, I’ll miss the feeling that I get when I catch a glimpse of these moments of happiness that are all around me. Because those are the moments that make you feel full and that inspire you to take a moment for yourself to just smile and be happy.